My craft friend Maryellen of Twiststyle is expecting a baby this spring. She remarked the other day on Facebook that she was so sick of people asking her if she was tired. I feel her pain.
No, I am most definately NOT pregnant. I am old. Old. I prefer being old to the alternative of NOT getting old, but like my cute pregnant friend, I am TIRED of people asking if I am tired. I have decided therefore to create a little card, check the items that apply, and hand out to the person who inquires . It will look like this:
Thank you for your inquiry. Please note:
1. I am not tired, I am old.
2. I am not tired, I am old and my eyes droop.
3. I am not tired, I am just pale because (see #1)
4. I am not tired, I just need a facelift...........OR
5. I AM tired, thank you for asking. I am tired because my teenager came in very late last night.
6. I AM tired thank you for asking. I am tired because the farmer, who can't hear, had the TV on too loud last night until 2 am watching Swamp Loggers.
7. I AM tired, thank you for asking. I am tired because a drunk person called at 2 am last night and thought he saw a cow on the road.
8. I AM tired, thank you for asking. I am tired because a drunk person HIT a cow on the road at 2 AM last night and the police called for the farmer to come and collect the carcass (of the cow not the drunk).
9. I AM tired, thank you for asking. I am tired because my miniature *donkey* hee-hawed and kept me awake for a long long time.
10. (and my personal favorite) I AM TIRED. And while we're at it I HAVE gained weight, thank you for noticing, and yes, my hair does need a trim. It HAS indeed been a while since I had my eyebrows done, and I am seriously considering therapy.
Please feel free to add possibilities to this list. photo credit uberculture at flickr