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Friday, January 1, 2010

Three things I learned in 2009

Last night as I lay in bed trying to keep my eyes open so I could say I saw 2010 come in, I thought back over 2009. I know lots of things happened, some probably pretty important, most not very important at all, but the one thing about getting older is the memory really does start to go. I could literally think of NOTHING that was noteworthy, nothing particularly interesting and certainly nothing worth writing about. After a few minutes of steady thought, three things came to mind, each unique in it's own way and of NO importance to anyone but me. Then I fell asleep and missed 2010's arrival...too much thinking I guess....anyway, here are the three lessons I learned in 2009 I could remember:

1. Never, never try to iron and talk on the phone at the same time. If you happen to become distracted and lay the phone and iron down to do something else, the iron burns really bad if you try to talk on's not a good look for the face either.

2. If you ever decide to buy a miniature donkey and are being interviewed by a potential seller, and they ask you if you have any experience with donkeys, the answer is NOT "Well I've been married to a jackass for 25 years"...not if you want to buy one from that person. They could become insulted and hang up.

3. When cooking spaghetti sauce and allowing it to come to a boil, it is best to stay home and not get a hair cut and go to Wal-Mart. Spaghetti sauce that has simmered for almost 3 hours on medium high can eat through a stainless steel pan and stink up a house really really bad. It produces white smoke that permeates all fabrics and clings to walls...and lasts a really long time.

Well, that's it for 2009...I figure if I can master these lessons, things in 2010 will feel better and smell better than 2009. Plus, someone with a sense of humor sold us a nice donkey...The farmer still thinks he's married to a jackass...come to think of it, after 2009, he may be right.

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